RELATIONSHIPS · 8 LOVE STYLES
Love Styles Test: how you give and receive love
Our free love styles test rates 8 ways people feel loved, from Heartfelt Words to Steady Commitment, and shows how you give love in return. 41 questions, about 6 minutes.
- 41 questions
- About 6 minutes
- Free summary
- Full report optional
Sample result
Top style: Full Attention
Example only. Yours shows all 8 styles.
Built by the Insight Metrics team
- Written by Alden Cross, Research Writer
- Reviewed by Aarav Vardhan, Editor-in-Chief
- Data checked by Leon Falkner, Data & Research Analyst
Insight Metrics is trusted by 2.4M+ people · As seen in Forbes and Wired
- Questions
- 41
- Time
- About 6 min
- Cost
- Free to take · free summary
- Full report
- Optional
- Based on
- Our own 8-style model
INTRODUCTION
The Love Styles Test is a free love quiz that shows which of eight kinds of care make you feel most loved, and how you tend to show love. You rate 32 everyday moments, like a partner handling a chore you were dreading, then answer 8 questions on how you give love and one final pick that breaks ties. Each style gets its own score, so you see a profile, not one label.
8
love styles, each scored on its own scale
41
questions, in about six minutes
2
sides of love measured: what you need and what you give
Your partner surprises you with something small you mentioned weeks ago.
How loved would this make you feel?
Pick an answer to start. Your choice is saved and the test continues from question 2.
HOW IT WORKS
How the test works
- 01
Answer 41 short questions
Rate 32 everyday moments, like your partner reaching for your hand after a disagreement, from Hardly to Enormously. Then answer 8 questions on how often you show each kind of love, and 1 final pick. Go with your first reaction.
- 02
See your free summary
A short form asks for your contact details, then your result opens: a chart of all 8 styles, with bars for what you need and dots for what you give, plus a summary of your top style.
- 03
Go deeper if you want
The full report is optional. It covers your top style in depth, your gaps, scripts for asking without blame, repair steps, date ideas and a 4-week plan, on the page and as a PDF.
Discover how you give and receive love
41 short questions, about 6 minutes. See all 8 styles on one chart and your top style in a free summary.
Free to take · Free summary · Full report optional
THE 8 LOVE STYLES
The 8 love styles we measure
No style is better than another, and most people score high on several.
Heartfelt Words
Spoken or written appreciation: a compliment with a reason, encouragement before something hard, “I love you” said out loud. People high on this style keep kind words for years and feel a careless remark for days.
Full Attention
Undivided, unhurried time together: phones away, eyes up, a walk where you really talk. For people high on this style, ten focused minutes can mean more than a whole evening side by side on separate screens.
Everyday Help
Practical help that lightens your load: a chore done before you ask, an errand handled, a task owned from start to finish. People high on this style hear “I love you” in follow-through more than words.
Warm Touch
Affectionate, everyday closeness: a long hug hello, holding hands, a hand on your back, sitting close on the couch. It’s about warmth and comfort, not just romance, and it can calm people high on this style faster than words.
Little Surprises
Small, thoughtful gestures that show you were on someone’s mind: a snack you mentioned weeks ago, a postcard from a trip, a song sent at the right moment. The price matters far less than the thought.
Being Heard
Being listened to and understood, especially about feelings. A partner who asks whether you want advice or just an ear, and who can sum up your side of an argument fairly, makes people high on this style feel loved.
Shared Adventures
Fun, play and new experiences together: a day trip somewhere new, a class for two, a recipe neither of you has tried. For people high on this style, shared stories and growing together keep love alive.
Steady Commitment
Reliability and a shared future: kept promises, showing up when you said you would, plans that include each other and money decisions made as a team. People high on this style feel loved when they feel safe.
Features
What a result looks like
A made-up example: need scores from 0 to 100, with how often this person gives each style. Everyday Help is given far more than it’s needed, a gap the full report explains.
WHAT YOU GET
Free summary, optional full report
Free summary
- A chart of all 8 styles: bars for what you need, dots for what you give
- Your top style, joint top, blend or broad profile
- A short summary of what it means
Full report
- Your top style in depth
- Your level on all 8 styles
- Your give-and-receive gaps
- 6 tips for this week
- A partner guide with scripts for asking
- Repair steps after an argument
- 6 date ideas for your style
- A 4-week plan, plus a PDF copy
The test and summary are free. The full report is optional, with a full refund if you ask within 3 days.
Why this love style quiz is different
Honest, practical and kind: you rate every moment on its own, see how you give as well as receive, and get a plain account of what research supports.
- Give and receive
- No forced choices
- Independent
- Scripts you can use
- No compatibility ratings
- Instant free summary
- Honest about research
QUICK ANSWERS
Love Styles test: quick answers
Short, direct answers to the questions people ask most, written and checked by our editorial team.
What are the 8 love styles and what do they mean?
The 8 love styles in the Love Styles Test are Heartfelt Words (sincere appreciation), Full Attention (undivided time), Everyday Help (practical help) and Warm Touch (affectionate closeness). The other four are Little Surprises (thoughtful small gestures), Being Heard (being listened to and understood), Shared Adventures (fun and new experiences together) and Steady Commitment (reliability and a shared future). Each one is scored for what you need and what you give.
How long does the love styles test take?
The Love Styles Test takes about 6 minutes and has 41 questions, one per screen. You rate 32 everyday moments on how loved each would make you feel, from Hardly to Enormously. Then you answer 8 questions on how often you show each style, and 1 final pick that only breaks exact ties. There are no right answers, so go with your first reaction.
How is the love styles test scored?
The Love Styles Test scores each of its 8 styles on its own 0 to 100 scale. A style’s need score averages your ratings of its 4 everyday moments, and its give score comes from 1 question on how often you show it. Below 40 counts as low, 40 to 70 as mid and above 70 as high. A difference of 25 points or more between need and give counts as a gap.
Can you show love differently from how you receive it?
Yes, the way you show love can differ from the way you most like to receive it. The Love Styles Test measures both, with bars for what you need and dots for what you give. It does this because a 2022 study of 100 couples by Mostova, Stolarski and Matthews linked showing love in the way a partner prefers to higher relationship satisfaction. The study shows a link, not a cause.
What if my love style scores are all similar?
Close scores on all 8 love styles give you a broad profile, which means many kinds of care reach you. In the Love Styles Test, that happens when all 8 need scores sit within 15 points of each other. It is not a weak or unclear result. It helps to notice which kinds of care matter most on hard days and which on good days, then tell your partner.
What is in the full love styles report?
The optional full Love Styles Report goes deeper than the free summary. It covers your top style in depth, your level on all 8 styles, your give-and-receive gaps, 6 tips for this week, a partner guide with scripts for asking, repair steps after an argument, 6 date ideas, a 4-week plan and a PDF copy. It is a one-time payment, with a full refund if you ask within 3 days.
Is a love style the same as an attachment style?
A love style is not the same as an attachment style. In the Love Styles Test, a love style is a kind of care, such as Full Attention, that you need from a partner and give in return. An attachment style describes how you handle closeness, distance and trust. Cindy Hazan and Phillip Shaver applied attachment theory to adult romantic love in 1987. This test does not measure attachment.
What are the six classic love styles from research?
The six classic love styles come from sociologist John Alan Lee, who described them in the 1970s. They are Eros (passionate love), Ludus (game-playing love), Storge (friendship love), Pragma (practical love), Mania (possessive love) and Agape (selfless love). Clyde and Susan Hendrick built a questionnaire to measure them in 1986. They describe attitudes toward love, not the 8 kinds of care you need and give in the Love Styles Test.
What makes people feel loved, according to research?
Relationship research links feeling loved and close to a few things, not just one. A central one is responsiveness: the sense that a partner understands, values and cares for you, which Reis, Clark and Holmes described in 2004. Shared new experiences matter too. In studies by Aron and colleagues in 2000, couples who tried new and challenging activities together felt better about their relationship than couples doing routine ones.
How do I tell my partner what makes me feel loved?
To tell your partner what makes you feel loved, pick a calm moment and lead with what you enjoy, not what is missing. Then ask for one small, specific habit with a day or time attached, such as a phone-free hour every Thursday if your top love style is Full Attention. Thank them specifically when it happens. The optional full report includes a word-for-word script for your top style.
Who is the love styles test for?
The Love Styles Test is for adults who want to understand how they give and receive care, whether they are dating, married, in a long-distance relationship or single. Every question uses gender-neutral wording such as “your partner” and “they”, so it works for couples of any gender. Singles picture a past partner or the partner they hope to meet. It is a reflection tool, not therapy or a diagnosis.
What are the limits of a love styles test?
A love styles test shows which kinds of care help you feel loved, but it is not a diagnosis and cannot predict whether a relationship will last. Your answers reflect how you feel now and can shift with stress or time apart. One label rarely tells the whole story: a 2024 review by Impett, Park and Muise found little support for one main way of feeling loved per person.
What are love styles?
In short
Love styles are the kinds of care that make you feel loved, and the ways you tend to show love. Our test measures eight: Heartfelt Words, Full Attention, Everyday Help, Warm Touch, Little Surprises, Being Heard, Shared Adventures and Steady Commitment. Most people score high on several, so a profile says more than one label.
The phrase “love styles” can mean three different things:
| Idea | What it describes | Source |
|---|---|---|
| Love styles (our test) | Which kinds of care make you feel loved, and how you show love | Our own 8-style model |
| Attachment styles | How you handle closeness, distance and trust | Hazan and Shaver (1987) |
| Love attitudes | Six attitudes toward love, from passionate to practical | Hendrick and Hendrick (1986) |
Our test measures the first idea only. For a wider picture of your personality, try our Big Five personality test.
Love styles and the love-languages idea
In short
The love-languages idea comes from Dr. Gary Chapman’s 1992 book, which describes five ways of expressing love. Ours is a separate, independent test with eight styles of our own. You rate each moment on its own scale, and you see how you give love as well as how you receive it.
Many people find us after searching for a love language quiz or a love languages test. Those searches usually point to the quiz based on Chapman’s book, The 5 Love Languages®. Our test shares the core idea, that people feel loved in different ways, but differs in four ways:
- Eight styles, adding Being Heard, Shared Adventures and Steady Commitment.
- No forced choices: you never have to pick between a hug and a kind word.
- Giving and receiving, side by side.
- A profile: every style gets its own score.
If you came looking for a free love language test, ours is free to take, with a free summary. It isn’t the official quiz and isn’t affiliated with the book, its author or its publisher.
Are there 5, 7 or 8 love styles?
In short
There’s no fixed number. Chapman’s book names five. Lists of seven, often searched as the seven love languages, come from other writers and test makers, and we use eight. A 2024 research review found little support for exactly five types and suggested that love works more like a balanced diet.
So what are the 7 love languages? There’s no agreed list. Seven-style models usually add ideas such as shared activities, money or intellectual connection, so a 7 love styles test or a 7 love languages quiz elsewhere may rank you differently. We added three themes that research on close relationships keeps returning to: feeling understood, sharing new experiences and feeling secure.
How do I find my love style?
In short
Finding your love style starts with noticing three things: what you ask for most, what hurts most when it’s missing, and how you show love without thinking. They usually point to the same one or two styles. A short test helps by putting all eight love styles side by side, so you see your whole profile instead of guessing.
People often search “what is my love language” after an argument or a hard week. Before any test, ask yourself:
- What do I complain about most, even jokingly?
- What makes me feel close again after a fight?
Like a “what is my love language” quiz, our test answers a simple question, what makes me feel loved, but with eight styles, and it also shows how you give love. Pair it with our introvert or extrovert test for a fuller picture of how you connect.
16 personality types in love: is there a 16 love types test?
In short
A 16 love type test usually means one of two things: a look at how the 16 personality types behave in love, or a quiz that sorts people into 16 romantic types. Insight Metrics has no separate 16 love type quiz. Your personality type and your love style answer different questions, so the clearest picture comes from knowing both.
Type describes how you think, decide and recharge; love style describes which kinds of care reach you. Any type can have any love style. We don’t have data yet on which styles are common for each type, so we won’t guess.
If you were looking for a love type personality test, a love type 16 quiz or a Japanese love type test, try pairing two tests: our 16-type personality test for your type, then your type’s page among our 16 personality types:
What does the research say about love styles?
In short
Research on love styles supports the idea that people value different kinds of care, but not that each person has just one. A 2024 review by Impett, Park and Muise found little support for exactly five types or one main type per person. A 2022 study of 100 couples linked meeting a partner’s preferences to higher satisfaction.
- Impett, Park and Muise (2024) found little support for three ideas: one main way of feeling loved per person, exactly five ways, and happier couples when both share the same one. They argued that forced-choice quizzes create trade-offs people don’t face in real life.
- Mostova, Stolarski and Matthews (2022) studied 100 couples. A better match between one partner’s way of showing love and the other’s preferences went with higher relationship and sexual satisfaction. The study was correlational, so it shows a link, not a cause.
Our three added styles draw on research into feeling understood (Reis, Clark and Holmes, 2004), new shared activities (Aron and colleagues, 2000) and commitment (Rusbult, Martz and Agnew, 1998).
Who made this love style quiz?
In short
The Insight Metrics editorial team wrote every question and result text in the Love Styles Test from scratch, without copying any other quiz. Alden Cross wrote the test, Aarav Vardhan reviewed it and Leon Falkner checked the data. It’s a reflection tool for adults, not therapy and not a diagnosis.
The writer didn’t look at any other quiz while drafting. Each style gets four everyday moments, spread across ordinary days, stressful days, celebrations, time apart and the hours after an argument, with gender-neutral wording and no money amounts. Meet Alden Cross, Aarav Vardhan and Leon Falkner on our editorial team page, or contact us.
FAQ
Love Styles Test FAQ
Is the test free?
Yes. It’s free to take, and the summary is free: a chart of all 8 styles and a short read on your top style. The full report is an optional one-time payment, with no subscription and a full refund if you ask within 3 days. See our Refund Policy.
Is this the official quiz from Dr. Gary Chapman’s book?
No. When people talk about the love language test or the love languages quiz, they usually mean the quiz linked to Chapman’s book, The 5 Love Languages®. Ours is an independent test with eight styles of our own, not affiliated with or endorsed by Dr. Chapman or The Moody Bible Institute of Chicago.
What love type am I?
Your result answers that with a profile, not one label. If your top two styles are within 10 points, you share a joint top; if your top three are, you have a blend; if all eight are close, a broad profile. Think of it as a love type test that shows the whole picture.
Can my partner and I take it together?
Yes, one at a time. There’s no built-in compare, so each of you takes it alone, then you share charts over a relaxed meal and each ask for one small new habit. If you wanted a love languages quiz for couples, this routine covers the same ground.
Does the test tell us if we’re compatible?
No. It doesn’t rate how compatible two people are or make predictions. Different top styles don’t mean a poor match; they show where each of you can aim. What seems to matter more is giving each other the kinds of care you each value, and that can be learned.
How scientific is this test?
It’s a reflection tool, not a clinical measure. The model is our own, built on themes from relationship research, and the questions are new. Once enough people have taken it, we’ll check how well each style’s questions hang together and share the results. Use your result to start a conversation.
I’m single. Can I still take it?
Yes. As you answer, picture a past partner or the kind of partner you hope to meet. Your result shows what to look for, and what to ask for early, in a new relationship. Many styles also apply to close friends and family.
Can my love style change over time?
Yes. Stress, a new baby, a demanding job or a long-distance stretch can shift what you need most. Your broad pattern may stay similar while the order of your top styles moves. Retaking the test every six months or so is an easy way to check in.
Is this also a “how do I show love” quiz?
Partly. Eight of the 41 questions ask how often you show each style, and your chart puts a dot for giving next to each bar for receiving. So it works as a “how do you show love” quiz and a receiving quiz in one.
Is this a love test quiz that tells me if I’m in love?
No. Most search results for “the love test” are name calculators and games, and an “am I in love” quiz asks a different question. Ours is a love test, free to take, about how you give and receive love. It isn’t a “hard to love” test either: no style is harder to love than another.
Which love style quiz is best?
Look for three things: it rates each kind of care on its own instead of forcing choices, shows how you give love as well as receive it, and is honest about what research supports. The same checklist works if you’re hunting for the best love language test or a love languages assessment.
Is my result private?
Your result sits on a private link that search engines don’t index, and we don’t sell your details. Our Privacy Policy explains what we collect, how long we keep it and how to ask us to delete it, and you can always contact us.
START YOUR ASSESSMENT
Find out how you give and receive love
41 questions, about 6 minutes. Free to take, free summary, full report only if you want it.